The 10 worst beauty tips ever!

Saw this on "MSN today"... thot it was quite entertaining

We don't know who started circulating this bad beauty advice, but now's the perfect time to retire all of it.

Myth No. 1. Brush your lips with a damp, old toothbrush to rid them of flakes:

Can we just say "Ouch"? A soft towel or washcloth is equally effective and completely nonirritating.

Myth No. 2. Apply moisturizer to damp skin:

"This absolutely never works," celebrity makeup artist Mally Roncal says. "The moisturizer just slides off your face, and so does any makeup you apply on top of it."

Myth No. 3. Wear only matte and muted tones once you're out of your 20s:

"Women seem to be afraid that shimmer and bright colors are aging," Carmindy, the makeup guru on the TLC series What Not to Wear says. "But nothing sucks the life out of you more than drying matte textures and washed-out neutrals. Just keep the shimmer subtle and the color soft and fresh rather than overly bright or dark."

Myth No. 4. Lipstick and lip gloss can double as eye shadow or blush:

"The textures are too greasy for your cheeks and even more so for your eyelids," says Armani's Tim Quinn. "It's such a mess!"

Myth No. 5. You can mend split ends:

No matter how luxe the product or extravagant its claims, the only way to get rid of splits is by snipping them off.

Myth No. 6. For incredible shine and softness, brush your hair 100 strokes a day:

"Overbrushing stresses and weakens hair follicles, which leads to breakage," says New York City salon owner Ouidad. "It also causes split ends and frizz."
- I think this myth makes sense leh. If you brush your hair 100 strokes a day, I'm sure it'll turn out as claimed... Maybe not the softness part, but at least shiny. Coz BOTAK already! HAHAHAHA!

Myth No. 7. Preparation H is a miracle under-eye de-puffer:

While this cream does contain anti-inflammatory ingredients, puffy eyes can be caused by other factors, such as fluid retention and allergies. Plus, other ingredients in the cream dry the skin and could really sting if they migrate into your eye. Bottom line? "There's just one place this cream was meant to go, and that's south of the border," says New York City dermatologist Dennis Gross.

Myth No. 8. Your nails need to breathe:

"Your nail is alive only at the part that is below the skin," Jan Nordstrom-Arnold, cofounder of Creative Nail Design, notes. "So there is no living and breathing going on where you can see it." In fact, removing polish in the hopes of giving your tips oxygen will only hasten their demise, since they will be left unprotected.

Myth No. 9. Apply Rogaine to help regrow overplucked brows:

"I've seen women show up with very weird-looking brows, with random bits of fuzz here and there," Quinn says. "The thing about Rogaine is that it doesn't grow hair back uniformly, and I don't even want to think about how much it could burn if it got into your eyes."

Myth No. 10. Pop an ibuprofen or two before waxing or having hair removed with a laser:

"I really wish women would stop doing this," says aesthetician Rhea Skeadas of New York City's Bliss Spa. "It causes little hickeys all over the skin." "Because it thins the blood, ibuprofen can increase your chances of bruising and redness," Dr. Gross concurs. If you are already taking a blood thinner, tell your aesthetician prior to any treatment so that she can be extra gentle.

top nth jokes of the year

The academic year is coming to a close for me. Actually, today's the last day off school and next week's study break, then the *forbidden word* period. So I'll randomly jot down a few of the many funny moments I had in school.

Today: did accpac crap with Horny Owl. SOO Farni!!! We tried our luck with it from 12nn.. OMy Gawd, booking a stupid decent com was reaally trying enough. then, had to amend the whole screwed batch listings sheytte again... Then aiya, cannot la, better to begin from scratch lor. amazingly Horny the pro, could nearly do everything wivout looking at the instructions. So I was like Huh?! U do la, u do la... Ya noe why? Because Horny doesn't have thumbdrive, so every accpac lesson while everyone does with the teacher step by step, she'll run thru the ENTIRE sheeytty process on her own. HAHAHAHA!

so I tried and tried to get the transaction and wadever sheytte repOttes corrected and Horny tried and tried to book a com beside me. Hahaha, because she didn't bring her notes... Then we were rummaging thru the wadever drives then she said, "Aye, got CD arh?" I said no, coz I didn't see anything. then she ejected the C drive... There a CD lies, as cold as steel... haha, no lar, trying to be poetic.

"See got anything inside anot," and she proceeded to close the C drive.

I went, "Eh! Don't anyhow hor.." fearing wad ulu programs it would run

Horny said, "NOo, we might be able to get the owner's information la!"

Then suddenly, "AYE! (I hopped) It's empty!". and she started laughing...

I asked her what izzit? She said "you" and mimicked what how I hopped...

Then, at 2, I finished! HOHOHO then it was so-called HOrny's turn to use my com to do hers. But no, she had to find a short cut. So she went thru the files trying to find a leak in the system... Haha, like a terrorist on the prowl... Oops, sensitive issue? but it didn't tell her long to find what she wanted. HAHAHA, it was like "EH! Can change name one lor!" ... ...

After printing out, we went to look for Krishna! -our teacher, not the.. ok, nvm. to our DISSappointment, the ans was wrong OK!? Oh ya, den something even stranger happened. we were talking to Krishna and I forgot what he said, but I shot Horny a look. Then for DUNO WAD REASON, that threw her into a frenzy giggling-fit! She tried to turn away but Krishna asked her wads the matter, so she faced him again.. I was still listening to what he was saying. Then I sat down and so did Horny, but she was still laughing! Until cannot. So paiseh la! the teacher explaining stuff and den this ferler laugh and laugh... and I also laughed at how she laughed. Next she excused herself from the room and went outside to laugh to her heart's content. When she came back in, she was still abit laugh-struck.

Anyway, we copied down the model answer the teacher showed us and left again to re-REdo. Outside I asked her what she was laughing about again.

She began with "You didn't hear meh? When I asked him 'So how many accounts should there be?" Then he went, '... then, you.. double click... double click...' Someone more like abit slow lydat...

It's like you ask someone What did you eat for breakfast? Then the person say 'Cereal'. Then 'When did you have breakfast?' 'Cereal' Hahahaha! (she laughs)Or 'What did you eat for breakfast?' 'Cereal' 'When did you have breakfast?' 'Open the box, pour out the cereal, pour in the milk...'
"

Thats NOT the end of the story!!! Shit la, this time must getit by hook or by crook... then went to book another com 01... went into the room... EH?! how come got someone using our com?! Hai I dun wanna waste time le, so went straight to book another one. Horny's booking was still on the screen and her booking was correct mah! Anyway, I got 03. So we sat down and plotted. I mean, contemplated. Problem: Only Batch 1 was correct. Batch 2 was "deleted". Batch 3 and 4 contained the same transactions, were posted, BUT neither could be deleted!

Horny the pro went about her ways and analyzed the options for cheating, i mean correcting our mistake(s). wah liew, the same problemS I had yesterday resurfaced and I felt quite defeated la... thot we to redo everything again coz the spoilt batches can't be deleted still... then I rmb I had Mouldy's files! so we closed everything and tried to open her files. After seeing Horny's successfully attempt at changing and printing my trial balance under HER name, I thot we were really above the software... Haha in the end, cannot open. So we reopened my files and tried again. Then Horny was going to type in batch FOUR's particulars when I realised...

JUST NOW, got batch 4! now dun have! FYI, batch 4's disappearance is good news to us coz it was one of those problematic ones... Checked Trial Balance to see how far we were from our goal. Click here and there to see what we needed or didn't needed... Re-entered information once. Checked Trial Balance. Hmmm, still something missing... Re-entered information twice. Checked Trial Balance, mmmh! betta. Re-entered information thrice...

"YES!" "FUCK YES!" HAHAHAHA

- ya'all noe howda read anot?? INstead of going YES! simultaneously with me, Horny went "FUCK!" first...

SOO HILARIOUS! Then she hammered her fists like a duracell bunny... we were SOOO HAPPY! but not happy enough to make me forget to ask her:

"HaHaHA! Why did you say Fuck first?!"

Horny: "hahahahaha, I don't know! (cups her mouth and laughs somemore) Hahaha, Habit la!"

Mey: You're just a vulgar person la!

So we went to hand in our ACHEIVEMENT. Then I was reading her Crap English and How To Use It Book and I saw the new yorkers had a TERRIBLE way of pronounce simple words like yourself, myself etc bloody simple words. So I said to Horny, "Eeee! how come lydat wan?! Always become Awlus?!"

She said "Ya, it's lydat one.. they have a problem speaking their own language.. Hahaha. Actually I rmb there's this country thats the worst one... (squints one eye and thinks) where arh... ..."

"Timbaktu arh?" Hahahha!
- because there was once during an ITAB lab exercise, she put in the heading Timbaktu Polytechnic instead of Singapore Poly...

Finally, at the lift lobby, I look at Horny, and plucked up the courage to say...

"Can you gimme a high-5 for the record?"
-coz we usually avoid the '5' at the last moment by touching our hair, turning away, missing intentionally...

She said, "OK." And really gave me a high 5. Haha, but it was quite nerdy, more like we made a high-PACT... *PIAAK*


Quite sick of blogging already... the post for today's fart, i mean FUN, is already so long lar. To think Istill wanna blog for CRS and STATS lessons. CANNOT LIAO ARRRRGH!!!

Do you even know what a Free-rider is?

This is something I wanted to said a long time ago.

Everybody, Picture this.

A team member does a head start on the 5-member GROUP project without informing the other group members. Then this team member sends out a 30-slide powerpoint presentation to the rest of the team, and asks if anyone has anything to add on top the work he has done. Another two team members pair up and decide to edit the powerpoint by cutting out the excessive information, and at the same time leaves comments stating why they did so and why those information should be left out. On top of that, the pair adds on 6 slides that are not as in-depth as the initial 30 slides. They send their small contribution back to that team member. That was the last time they heard from him.

However the "high-initiative" team member takes it badly that the pair deleted so much of his copy-and-paste research, he in turn ignores their rationale of doing it and deletes their contributions altogether. He then keeps the final outcome of the presentation to himself and a close friend, who is also in the group, and leaves the rest of the team assuming that the it is in the modified state they had last seen. Before the day of presentation, this team member sends out the script he prepared for the entire team. Then, spliting the presentation into sections labelled only by their numbers (1-8, 9-18 and so on), he tells the remaining 4 team members to pick parts to present on.

On the day of presentation, the appaling truth on what the "team leader" had done sets in on 3 of the group members. Their contributions were gone and the whole presentation was back to square one. Slide after slide, redundant and extremely technical information was flashed, leaving the audience and themselves with very puzzled looks. The "team leader" and his friend chooses to overlook this glaring point and continues to read, word for word, off their scripts.

As the presentation wears on, the presenatation grader taps on his watch and frowns, while the moderator slums over his table. Frustration and distress begins to show clearly on thru the body language and facial expressions of the 3 group members. Soon, they can no longer hold it off, and tells the presenting party to stop reading off the script altogether. YET, he rigidly continues to do so...

'Til a point where the grader tells the group straight, to skip everything that is left move on to presenting the 3D-model. Tragically, the 2nd presentor still stubbornly tries to finish his part before the whole team screams at him to STOP.

After it all ends, the 3 digusted group members storms out of the room while the script-reading duo goes up to the grader and the moderatot to enquire how badly they did. The moderator points out that teamwork is obviously lacking and the other 3 group members made faces during their presentation. This is where the duo goes on to say that the 3 team members are free riders and they did not contribute "anything" but critism to their powerpoint. Then they request to split up and to handle the next assesment by themsleves...

(Of course the stupid grader bought their cock-and-bull story.)

From the above illustration, I would like to point out that the above accusation is a startling mis-use of vocab here. Because a free-rider is someone who DOES not contribute anything to the group project. Deleting somebody's contributions, no matter how meager, does NOT make him/her a free-rider, but it sure makes YOU a scheming, conniving, manipulating brat and liar. Maybe you didn't mean it; only because your grasp of english is only up to THAT level.

I think it's pretti darn obvious who and what i'm talking about. I don't need anyone to agree with me, but at least the truth is out. I actually know both sides of the story ok... I won't keep all the shit to myself anymore. That's what you get for rolling your sparsely-lashed, protruding eyeballs at ME when I didn't even do or say anything! You're beneath me. PERIOD.